June 21, 2018

It was one of those days where I decided I was going to do something with my day, and ended up doing all the stuff I hate: dishes and cleaning and tidying up and generally using Clorox.

I woke up late because I was up sick last night. Apparently if you drink a large coke at midnight after not having soda for years and then immediately lay down, you throw up all night. Who knew?!? So since I didn’t sleep due to that, and then my insomnia kicked in and I had to – had to – watch Friends for several hours, I didn’t get out of bed very early. Then I walked my dog, at which point I got yelled at by a stranger, as tends to happen.

Let me tell you what this strange person said to me. He stopped in the middle of traffic – cars honking all around him – to yell at me. I was listening to a podcast so I didn’t notice until the yelling was impossible to ignore. I take out one earbud, and this guy yells at me, “it’s too hot for her feet.” So I look down at my dog, who’s sniffing some other dog’s pee, and look back at him. But before I can tell him to fuck off with his unsolicited opinions, he tells me that “I have to feel the ground with the back of my hand for 10 seconds” and then proceeds to open his car door in the middle of traffic and put his hand down to DEMONSTRATE HOW TO TOUCH THE GROUND WITH A HAND. I was a combination of flabbergasted at the mansplaining and confused as to why it was happening. It was 70 degrees out. My dog was in the shade and very content. AND I KNOW HOW TO TOUCH THE GROUND. So instead of murdering him with my words, which I wanted to, I just said, “yeah, she’s fine. Thanks for your opinions!” and put my headphones back in and kept walking. I could hear him continuing to yell at me over the honking of the cars he was still blocking, but I ignored him. Later, I felt the ground because OBVIOUSLY NOW I HAD TO but just like I thought it barely felt warm and that guy can fuck off.

So I came home from that and cleaned my entire house for what seemed to be the first time ever based on the amount of grime and dirt and Swiffer pads I used. It was an effective way to distract myself, but not an effective way to make myself feel better. I ate Top Ramen for dinner and drank lemonade out of the carton like a frat guy (maybe they wouldn’t drink lemonade specifically, but the image is still accurate).

Maybe tomorrow I won’t cry into my overly salty, undercooked noodles. Oh, did I forget to mention the crying? Hmmm.

Day 11 – Numb but my house is clean.

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